The room was dark, with shafts of sunlight peeking through the curtain. I lived to see another day? I thought to myself as I slowly lost my consciousness. I was wrong…”
Last night, I came home to an empty apartment. As I chose to start a new chapter of my life, I decided to let go of everything I owned and loved. I poured myself a nice cup of tea and sat down with a notepad and pen to write a note about how thankful I was for everything I had achieved. I started by thanking my parents for the gift of life they had given me, all the amazing opportunities I got to experience because of them. Next, I thanked my siblings for making my life interesting and their random shenanigans that turned into stories that were shared at every family gathering. I thanked my friends for all the beautiful memories we made, the movie nights, the cheap dinners and to camping trips where we slept under the stars. I thanked the world for what it had taught me about itself and how every person that exists has their own story to share. As I finished scribbling on the notepad, I got up and walked to the balcony. As I sipped my tea, I observed the view around me. Everything was quite, everybody was asleep.
Will they remember me as Robin Williams, the guy who smiled through the pain or like Hannah Baker, who had thirteen reasons to end it all? I saw the sun rise as I finished my tea, i walked back to my room and lay on the bed, placed my tea cup on the night stand next to me with the note folded under it. The darkness that I saw when I closed my eyes was in fact the next chapter of my life or perhaps I should say the last chapter.
Life is full of events that provoke a new thought every second. For someone who is going through a rough time in his or her life, these thoughts can turn into suicidal. Words can’t describe the circumstances in which people make decisions about their life as their mind can’t reach to a conclusion that comprehends what they are feeling. In such situations one must get in contact with someone as soon as possible that they know can help them and pull them out of the darkness that surrounds them. You can call a family member, a friend or even an ambulance when having suicidal thoughts because in a nick of time, one can chose to end their life. Objects that can serve as a mean to commit suicide should be removed out of site immediately, use of drugs or alcohol should be avoided completely and I know it’s not as simple as it may sound but precautionary steps are important and you might find them helpful. Try to think of all the positive things that you’ve done in your life, your achievements, your good memories, your future goals, and the people you love. ERASE THOSE PESKY THOUGHTS, YOU ARE NOT WORTHLESS, YOU MATTER: TO ME AND TO THE WORLD.
Trust me, you’re never alone in this world, Pukaar; your support system, is just one message away. The team of amazing psychologist and counselors can help you identify the issues that are causing those thoughts that cloud your judgments and assist you in living a better and healthy life.
Written By: Izza Raza