Self-worth, self-esteem, self-confidence and self-belief; these are the words all of us hear on a daily basis. But what do they actually mean? How can they change your life? Or can they REALLY bring a positive change in your life at all?
For a minute, just close your eyes and reflect how you see yourself. How conscious are you about presenting a positive image in front of others? Are you satisfied with who you are? Are you comfortable with all sorts of comments passed by your friends and family about you? Do you feel content with yourself no matter whatever circumstances you might have to face?
From the very beginning, we have been raised in a world where we are being constantly judged and evaluated by others. No doubt, we have been conditioned to evaluate ourselves according to the so called ‘standards’ defined by others. Hence, it is perfectly safe to say that self-esteem has been developed within us by our society.
But wait, what exactly is self-esteem? It refers to the process when you compare yourself with others and evaluate yourself against the standards set by others. But who exactly are OTHERS to define your worth? Remember that other people can only judge you through their own limited perspective. Just like a fish can’t be evaluated for its ability to fly, you cannot be evaluated by the standards and criteria set by others. You are unique in your own way. You have your own strengths that may not be overtly visible by others because they do not know you as well as you know yourself. So never fall for the false criteria set by others as it can cripple you and vandalize your future in a manner that you may have never thought was possible. Here is a quick list regarding a few disastrous consequences of possessing low self-esteem that you may have been facing:
- You might have been consistently undermining your own capabilities. Without even giving something a shot, you must have been thinking that when you cannot succeed at it, why even take the risk of trying out something new?
- You must have been wrongly blaming yourself for anecdotes that were already out of your control
- You might have been gradually developing a shy personality and avoiding most of the interactions with others for the fear of being negatively judged by others
- You must have been continuously thinking about past failures
- You must have the habit of being preoccupied with negative outcomes although they have not even occurred yet! Hence you always say that something bad is going to happen although it has not even started yet!
- You must have been attempting to modify your behaviour to please others and hence leaving your own true identity far behind
Not only this, the worst part is that researches have shown low self-esteem to be linked with psychological distress and feelings of anxiety, fear, shame etc. Low self-esteem convinces you despite all the odds that you are lacking in every manner and thus limits the probability of your success, resulting in a self-fulfilling prophecy. Still not getting it? Suppose that you have been given an assignment. This seems a fairly easy task but if you have a low self-esteem you would fear that you would definitely fail in this assignment. These negative thoughts would not only influence your behaviour but they would also distract you so that you cannot deliver your hundred percent. And what would the result be? You would definitely fail despite possessing the ability to outclass everyone. Therefore, your low self-esteem illuded you into making false assumptions about yourself that influenced your behaviour and hence attached the label of a failure on you.
Therefore, never let your low self-esteem illude you. Always start a task with the mindset that you can ace it and notice the difference in the results yourself. Even if you fail, embrace it and start again with the belief that the failures have turned you into a better person. Belief in yourself and plunge into the pool of prosperity!